Comma or Semi-Colon?

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Kimberlysh
Posts: 9
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 5:18 pm

Comma or Semi-Colon?

Post by Kimberlysh »

I've been going back and forth on the following sentence and I'm hoping someone can help me decide if the two commas are correct or if I should just add a semi-colon after favorite:

It’s a twist on an old favorite, made with old-fashioned oats and plump juicy raisins, for a simple treat that doesn’t require baking.

Any help is appreciated. I've looked at it so long it's making my head spin.

Thanks,

Kim
TomBarth
Posts: 8
Joined: Tue Mar 15, 2011 11:36 am

Re: Comma or Semi-Colon?

Post by TomBarth »

I prefer it as you've shown it. The semi-colon variant seems wrong (and perhaps a tad too formal for the context and style that I sense here...)

Tom
Celeste Stewart
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Joined: Sun Jan 08, 2006 5:28 pm
Location: California
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Re: Comma or Semi-Colon?

Post by Celeste Stewart »

Hmmn, I'm not sure the problem is with punctuation. If we temporarily cross out the middle phrase, we can see that the other two phrases don't really connect properly:

It’s a twist on an old favorite for a simple treat that doesn’t require baking.

Since that doesn't quite make sense, I think we need to tweak the whole sentence. Here are some ideas that might work (depending on the surrounding sentences):

Made with old-fashioned oats and plump juicy raisins, this recipe is an old favorite with a twist: no baking required.

This simple treat, which doesn't require baking and is made with old-fashioned oats and juicy raisins, is a twist on an old favorite.

It’s a twist on an old favorite, complete with old-fashioned oats and plump juicy raisins; it's also a simple treat that doesn’t require baking.
Kimberlysh
Posts: 9
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 5:18 pm

Re: Comma or Semi-Colon?

Post by Kimberlysh »

Thank you Tom. I really appreciate your help. That was my first instinct but then I started anaylzing it and just couldn't decide.


Kim
Kimberlysh
Posts: 9
Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2011 5:18 pm

Re: Comma or Semi-Colon?

Post by Kimberlysh »

Celeste, I see what you mean. I guess I better rethink the whole sentence.

Thanks for your help,

Kim
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