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...I had a hard time making every decision from music to flowers, but worrying about whether or not I did the right thing in signing for cremation was the most difficult issue.

I also wondered if I could find closure without seeing my dad to say goodbye one last time. My brother put his arm around me and said that Dad simply wanted people to remember him the way they had last seen him. It was somehow touching and comforting to know that.

If we had known there was a way to plan and record such things so family members could share these details ahead of time, it would certainly have made dealing with all the details a little easier. We might have known what he wanted done with his ashes. We might have known if there was anything he wanted placed with him. Any number of issues would have been more clear. We did the best we could but knowing for sure that we had done everything right, the way he wanted it, would have been a great comfort.

Please share such details with the people you love. Talk about it. Record your final wishes for the people who love you so their sadness isn’t compounded by feelings of doubt or guilt because they aren’t sure how to proceed.

God bless.

*As this is very personal, I´d prefer to use a pen name if you choose the article and require an author´s name. If so, please use "S.H. Mills."

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Written by: another_mother
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